it's all worth it...

Last night I got home from the temple and asked Cory how the kids were.  He said, "so good."  Of course I asked him about it because I knew that they did something really cute or sweet.  He told me, after the boys went to bed, he went and sat on the floor in the hallway by their bedroom and just listened to them talk.  They were laying on the top bunk together and Briggs was reading to Ethan.  He said it's times like this that really make it all worth it... I agree, it is the silly giggles, laughter, sweet moments of love and peace in our home that I cherish.

Briggs and Ethan really love each other and love to be around each other and to do everything together.  Sure, they sometimes fight and they don't always agree... that's what siblings do, but at the end of the day there is genuine love and concern for each other and boy do they love and adore Brooklyn and Sterling.  A parent can't ask for more than that!

Just today during quiet time Brooklyn put herself down for a nap.  I went in to check on her with Ethan and I watched him walk over to her bed and sweetly kiss her arm.  Melt my heart.  Those two sure love each other and love to be together.

They also totally adore Sterling and love to make him smile.  Sterling loves to act goofy and make people laugh... boy he has a fun personality!  In fact, just yesterday I couldn't find Sterling anywhere.  I knew he couldn't have gone far.  After scouring almost the entire top floor I went into my bedroom and I saw the bathroom door shut.  I opened it and this is what I found...

...a very quiet Sterling, nestled with his back in the corner, with the all the toilet paper pulled off the roll... his dimpled little hands just picking the paper apart little by little.  Oh, he makes me smile!  

I really love being a wife and mother!  I am not perfect at it but the things I learn every day from my children are helping to shape me into the wife and mother that I know I have the potential to become... I wouldn't trade it for anything in the whole world.  It is the hardest thing I've ever done but it is by far the most rewarding.  When I look back on the years, sure I remember the multitude of tantrums my kids had, (some of my children seemed to have them for months on end) but I mostly remember all the soft and sweet and funny moments that have made my life so bright.  Kissing their sleepy cheeks each night and whispering in their ears that I love them and believe in them.  I wouldn't trade it!

Whenever Cory and I look back on the pictures from years past it always brings an ache to our hearts.  We often lament that we'll never get those moments back.  Yes, they are in my memory, and I'm sooooo glad I took so many pictures, but time has a way of going so very fast.  I guess to love is to hurt.  I know I'll never get to hold my baby briggs again, or kiss Ethan's full toddler-cheeks, or squeeze Brooklyn's baby chunky thighs and smell and snuggle my newborn Sterling but I wouldn't trade my life or experiences for anything.

I have so much to be grateful for...  and most of all I'm thankful for a loving Heavenly Father who trusts in me, and in Cory, enough to raise his sweet and special children.  It's all worth it!